Tuesday, December 28, 2004

VTM: Bloodlines Review Part 2

Ok, I was going to write another long review, but I found that as I dove into the details, I realized just how much this game sucked, and how much I tried to overlook that fact because it's in one of my favorite game settings.

The Good:
Some of the characters are in fact cool. If you have to play this disaster, play a Malkavian.
The ending is decent.

The Bad:

Incredibly clumsy movement makes good shooting footwork impossible, as well as getting through the common jumping mini-games without ripping your hair out.
The AI sucks balls.
The characters are all stereotypes of their vampire clans and sects.
You don't get a chance to save in between long dialogue sequences and boss fights.
Your vampire powers are all much weaker than their pen & paper versions, but your enemies seem to have access to even more powerful versions.
No multiplayer.
Loading screens, loading screens, loading screens! "Quick"-saving my ass.
The system requirements are HIDEOUS LIES.

In general, the game is a dumbed-down excuse for the World of Darkness, and a shitty attempt to combine FPS, stealth, and RPG elements. It's kinda like shit ice cream. Even if you like ice cream... hell, even if you like SHIT... they don't go well together. I have a million reasons as to why this game sucks, but these are the big ones. If the ending wasn't as good as it was, I would have set my computer on fire.

Final Score: 3/10 - And that's just because of the Source engine and World of Darkness.


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